I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
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