Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
