Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
