do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Randomize
