but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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