If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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