Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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