I forgot how hot balto sounded
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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