I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
