She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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