She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
