I just cut my nipple shaving
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
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