Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
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