I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
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