he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
