In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Randomize
