Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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