She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
