I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
