This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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