what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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