i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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