just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
