can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
