STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
