definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
