let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
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