I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
