I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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