She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Randomize
