dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
