I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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