you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Randomize
