I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
He better not be in your backpack
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
