After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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