Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Success! We fucked roommates!
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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