Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
