i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
