bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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