just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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