I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
