Soap is not a condiment
Only a mothe r could love this liver
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Randomize
