your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize