Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
