Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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