24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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