just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
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