Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize