porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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