Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Randomize
